One thing about me is that I have to have things figured out. I can't let go of a conundrum. And so when presented with the question "Why and How a person can act the way they do?" my little ole pea brain just kept working on it until the AHA moment came...ARROGANCE
It's kind of like "the devil made me do it" (fellow old-timers, that was Flip Wilson wasn't it? I loved Flip Wilson)
Yes, sometimes it's pure, unrelenting ARROGANCE that drives behavior. Trying to wrap your brain around "how could they be that way", "why can't they see the damage they do" is futile....it's ARROGANCE through and through.
Now I can work on the next puzzle....
Happy free "stay at home day" to all who are enjoying a day off and the lovely East Coast/Mid-Atlantic weather!
Monday, September 6, 2010
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Gorgeous Weather Saturday
One of those days when everyone is wishing the whole summer could be like this - maybe until the first snowfall-or at least a full week?
Kate's first soccer practices were this week and she's pumped about playing again. Fierce is the word that comes to mind when I see her running on the field. She can't wait to put the uniform on for the first game - and what a cool uniform - shirts more like under armour than the usual shiny gross oversized stuff....very cool...and yes it is worth the extra time it takes to drive to Ashburn so she doesn't have to wear the ugly orange SYSA uniform....betcha thought I was kidding, but I wasn't!
Today was back to school haircut and new sneakers...how I wish she was wearing a uniform and little leather oxfords with knee socks! Those were the good old parochial days of my childhood.
Tomorrow I have a Thai massage - thank you Joe for returning to Evian/Solace - you were missed!
Kate's first soccer practices were this week and she's pumped about playing again. Fierce is the word that comes to mind when I see her running on the field. She can't wait to put the uniform on for the first game - and what a cool uniform - shirts more like under armour than the usual shiny gross oversized stuff....very cool...and yes it is worth the extra time it takes to drive to Ashburn so she doesn't have to wear the ugly orange SYSA uniform....betcha thought I was kidding, but I wasn't!
Today was back to school haircut and new sneakers...how I wish she was wearing a uniform and little leather oxfords with knee socks! Those were the good old parochial days of my childhood.
Tomorrow I have a Thai massage - thank you Joe for returning to Evian/Solace - you were missed!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
I'm Still Standing
HeeeEEEEYYYY!
Great weekend - did you check me out on FB? Took the train to NYC with babygirl on Saturday and hit American Girl Place, bought her the doll, and a basketball outfit for "the doll", and toured around NY on a gorgeous day on a siteseeing bus, and saw my Spanish/Chinese son Eduardo briefly, and Sunday I rocked the academic garb as a Georgetown faculty member welcoming the freshman class of 2014. Grand finale? Yes I did have one....saw Donna Summer at WolfTrap on Sunday night and it was GREATTTTT!!!! Great show, she never sounded better, great seats, great company, great wine and snacks before the show...there was one drawback but it pains me to recall so I'll leave that out...had to do with someone seated near us...
So Monday rolls around and it's an ok day and I'm headed out to pick up Kate's soccer uniform and I get on the wrong train...don't ask me how it happens, ok, it just does and that cost me a half hour, then I waited in WFC for almost an hour for the f'ing bus, and finally on my way out to Leesburg to take care of business when I get a message from work about having a chat regarding something I'd submitted as a "final draft".
Turns out (through mostly no fault of my own) I was off the mark in terms of the audience I was actually writing to...but getting the message made me nervous and having to rewrite (again, 2nd time) made me nervous too...I should take these things in stride but have a lot at stake right now...so we get on the call and talk through things and I'm less uneasy and so not even that annoyed that "Play It Again Sports" in Leesburg was out of the stock on the uniform....so I head to Wegman's to pick up a few things for dinner and of course, some wine.
I got home and unpacked my groceries and found there was no wine to be found...I'd left it at the checkout. Under normal circumstances this would not bring a woman to tears but let's just say these were not normal circumstances so I had a little fit then drank a glass of red...was ok, we were having steak anyway....
and yesterday morning thought I'd planned it perfectly but still managed to be very late for my doctor's appt in Bethesda...headed to the office to work on some stuff that needs to get done and meet with my advisor...we even met an hour earlier than planned so I was able to get out of the office to get Kate to her first soccer practice...ha ha ha, that's so funny, isn't it? it's not? ooooh, forgot to mention that I'd left the side door on the mommymobile open and the battery died (takes an hour and a half for that to happen, btw) so I was stuck at the Dunn Loring Metro Station with my jumper cables waiting for either of the cars parked beside me to move or a miracle. Turns out I got the miracle. Not 1 but 2 people to help and we connected 2 sets of cables together to get enough length to reach a car behind the van to do the jump. And I was not amused AT ALL by the references to 'BEING JUMPED'...
oooh, what makes this even funnier is that it was 96 degrees in the shade and I was drenched...schvitzing as my Hebrew brethren like to say....big SCHVITZ! So my car is running and it's cooling off inside and I'd triaged a ride to practice for Kate so decided to go to the OTHER store and get that uniform DAMMIT! I'd already called and they said they had her size in stock...so off I went. That done I went back to good old Wegman's with my good old receipt and got my wine...then gas...then home.
I don't care what anyone says, I deserved a wine party after those two days...
and if you missed this on Facebook, last week was also a doozy - with me and some dork at the Park n Ride screaming at each other as we got off the bus and all the way to our cars....I was not in the mood for anyone to start up with me and that's all he seemed to want to do so I had to "get Chester on him".
Now I'm going to Chester up and get on with things because the stupid shit that keeps happening is making me laugh at this point...and thank you to the not ONE but TWO GOOD SAMARITANS at the train station who took the time in the heat after a day at work to get me back on the road....Thank you and God Bless You! You know they were glad I didn't hug them being all schvitzy and all, right?
So here's to jumper cables x 2, calling ahead to see if the merch is in stock, keeping your receipt handy, J. Lohr chardonnay, and the ability to work from home on occasion.....All's well that ends well and I'm still standing.
Great weekend - did you check me out on FB? Took the train to NYC with babygirl on Saturday and hit American Girl Place, bought her the doll, and a basketball outfit for "the doll", and toured around NY on a gorgeous day on a siteseeing bus, and saw my Spanish/Chinese son Eduardo briefly, and Sunday I rocked the academic garb as a Georgetown faculty member welcoming the freshman class of 2014. Grand finale? Yes I did have one....saw Donna Summer at WolfTrap on Sunday night and it was GREATTTTT!!!! Great show, she never sounded better, great seats, great company, great wine and snacks before the show...there was one drawback but it pains me to recall so I'll leave that out...had to do with someone seated near us...
So Monday rolls around and it's an ok day and I'm headed out to pick up Kate's soccer uniform and I get on the wrong train...don't ask me how it happens, ok, it just does and that cost me a half hour, then I waited in WFC for almost an hour for the f'ing bus, and finally on my way out to Leesburg to take care of business when I get a message from work about having a chat regarding something I'd submitted as a "final draft".
Turns out (through mostly no fault of my own) I was off the mark in terms of the audience I was actually writing to...but getting the message made me nervous and having to rewrite (again, 2nd time) made me nervous too...I should take these things in stride but have a lot at stake right now...so we get on the call and talk through things and I'm less uneasy and so not even that annoyed that "Play It Again Sports" in Leesburg was out of the stock on the uniform....so I head to Wegman's to pick up a few things for dinner and of course, some wine.
I got home and unpacked my groceries and found there was no wine to be found...I'd left it at the checkout. Under normal circumstances this would not bring a woman to tears but let's just say these were not normal circumstances so I had a little fit then drank a glass of red...was ok, we were having steak anyway....
and yesterday morning thought I'd planned it perfectly but still managed to be very late for my doctor's appt in Bethesda...headed to the office to work on some stuff that needs to get done and meet with my advisor...we even met an hour earlier than planned so I was able to get out of the office to get Kate to her first soccer practice...ha ha ha, that's so funny, isn't it? it's not? ooooh, forgot to mention that I'd left the side door on the mommymobile open and the battery died (takes an hour and a half for that to happen, btw) so I was stuck at the Dunn Loring Metro Station with my jumper cables waiting for either of the cars parked beside me to move or a miracle. Turns out I got the miracle. Not 1 but 2 people to help and we connected 2 sets of cables together to get enough length to reach a car behind the van to do the jump. And I was not amused AT ALL by the references to 'BEING JUMPED'...
oooh, what makes this even funnier is that it was 96 degrees in the shade and I was drenched...schvitzing as my Hebrew brethren like to say....big SCHVITZ! So my car is running and it's cooling off inside and I'd triaged a ride to practice for Kate so decided to go to the OTHER store and get that uniform DAMMIT! I'd already called and they said they had her size in stock...so off I went. That done I went back to good old Wegman's with my good old receipt and got my wine...then gas...then home.
I don't care what anyone says, I deserved a wine party after those two days...
and if you missed this on Facebook, last week was also a doozy - with me and some dork at the Park n Ride screaming at each other as we got off the bus and all the way to our cars....I was not in the mood for anyone to start up with me and that's all he seemed to want to do so I had to "get Chester on him".
Now I'm going to Chester up and get on with things because the stupid shit that keeps happening is making me laugh at this point...and thank you to the not ONE but TWO GOOD SAMARITANS at the train station who took the time in the heat after a day at work to get me back on the road....Thank you and God Bless You! You know they were glad I didn't hug them being all schvitzy and all, right?
So here's to jumper cables x 2, calling ahead to see if the merch is in stock, keeping your receipt handy, J. Lohr chardonnay, and the ability to work from home on occasion.....All's well that ends well and I'm still standing.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Workin' for a Living
People often ask me how I do it and I just laugh a little. Because I just do. It's a big juggling act. It's having it all but not all at the same time. It's you're teaching this semester and big new prof on campus but the laundry isn't getting done so much and that's irritating. It's having the weekend off from your full time job but having papers or exams to grade. It's finally feeling like you're turning the corner after the struggle of the transfer into the consulting role but missing all but one of the kids' school events....
I love irony...I'm on the school scrapbook committee and had absolutely no event pics of either child to contribute this year.
I'm an all or nothing kind of girl in every sense of the word I guess...
Seriously, it's all about balance...it's about maintaining even the slightest bit of control over the areas that matter and letting yourself decide that some areas matter less and some not at all. It's about not worrying who else does it better or differently or stressing because you can't or don't want to do something the way you've always done it ...cooking it from scratch, etc. Life is too short....
The secret is in the balance and sometimes things tip too far in one direction or the other. As long as you catch it and give yourself permission to take the time to catch up on the things that might have gone awry. Trying to be perfect is a futile and thankless endeavor. We're human....if we take ourselves too seriously we add unnecessary pressure and stress to our lives. And "when momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy"....who wants to live like that.
I like to leave it in God's hands. My sacrifices I offer up to God, working through my frustrations I offer up to God, using my talents to help people I offer up to God, inspiring me to raise my children to be good little Catholic people I request of God, being present in the moment and not dwelling on past disappointment or worries about the future I'm able to do when I leave it up to God.
Dear God, Thank you for the abundant blessings in my life...my wonderful children, my nice home and neighborhood and neighbors, my 10 years working for a great company, the opportunity to teach at Georgetown, the friends who are there when I need to talk or need a word of encouragement, for knowing that my mother loves me even though she can't be here for me the way I want and need her to be, for my godparents who treated me as their own child and love me "just because". For another day and another opportunity to serve you. Thank you Lord.
Amen.
I love irony...I'm on the school scrapbook committee and had absolutely no event pics of either child to contribute this year.
I'm an all or nothing kind of girl in every sense of the word I guess...
Seriously, it's all about balance...it's about maintaining even the slightest bit of control over the areas that matter and letting yourself decide that some areas matter less and some not at all. It's about not worrying who else does it better or differently or stressing because you can't or don't want to do something the way you've always done it ...cooking it from scratch, etc. Life is too short....
The secret is in the balance and sometimes things tip too far in one direction or the other. As long as you catch it and give yourself permission to take the time to catch up on the things that might have gone awry. Trying to be perfect is a futile and thankless endeavor. We're human....if we take ourselves too seriously we add unnecessary pressure and stress to our lives. And "when momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy"....who wants to live like that.
I like to leave it in God's hands. My sacrifices I offer up to God, working through my frustrations I offer up to God, using my talents to help people I offer up to God, inspiring me to raise my children to be good little Catholic people I request of God, being present in the moment and not dwelling on past disappointment or worries about the future I'm able to do when I leave it up to God.
Dear God, Thank you for the abundant blessings in my life...my wonderful children, my nice home and neighborhood and neighbors, my 10 years working for a great company, the opportunity to teach at Georgetown, the friends who are there when I need to talk or need a word of encouragement, for knowing that my mother loves me even though she can't be here for me the way I want and need her to be, for my godparents who treated me as their own child and love me "just because". For another day and another opportunity to serve you. Thank you Lord.
Amen.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Is it really mid-August? School Supplies Blues
Summer has been a blur....no surprise there....
this has been quite the weekend - this is what's gone on....
I was uninvited to a reunion that I'd previously been invited to (it was just teasing, good thing I'm not sensitive?)...
I drove 40 minutes to a friends to work on layouts for my kids' school scrapbook and forgot most of the pictures I'd planned to use...
The track ball on my NEW blackberry died ...
I went to the A T & T store to blackberry track ball replaced knowing there was a chance they didn't do service at that location....45 mins later it was confirmed that they do not do service at that location...I do not like to waste 5 mins much less 45!
In between all that I subjected myself to a bikini wax....no, I don't wear a bikini!
I got home and baked brownies. While they were on the back of the stove cooling one of the boxers, not sure whether it was Dumb or Dumber, managed to drag the pan forward and slurp a sizable chunk out of the middle.....precious puppies...
Weather forecast for tomorrow is thunder showers...do I commute into DC or work from home? Pros and Cons to both....
I cannot believe that school starts up in 3 weeks....the good news is that I ordered all of the school supplies from Amazon.com, got free shipping, and the prices are comparable to what's in Target....
What happened to going back to school with a new school bag, pencil case, two sharpened #2 pencils, a red pencil and a pink pearl eraser? I spent nearly $100 on school supplies and I'm not quite done. There's another $25-$30 on the list of things needed. Granted, I did not go to public school. My mom paid tuition but I have to believe that I'm shelling out more per year per child now for public school than she paid in tuition for the whole year?
I wonder how many pairs of Fiskars blunt tip kid scissors I will end up buying before I'm done? I think I've already bought a minimum of a half dozen.
I guess I should be grateful neither is into clothes at the moment - track pants and t-shirts work for him and whatever I buy is is fine with her because she sheds that and puts on her track pants and t-shirt as soon as she gets home...she's leading a double life...girly girl by school hours and tom-boy at home. Don't tell her I told you!
this has been quite the weekend - this is what's gone on....
I was uninvited to a reunion that I'd previously been invited to (it was just teasing, good thing I'm not sensitive?)...
I drove 40 minutes to a friends to work on layouts for my kids' school scrapbook and forgot most of the pictures I'd planned to use...
The track ball on my NEW blackberry died ...
I went to the A T & T store to blackberry track ball replaced knowing there was a chance they didn't do service at that location....45 mins later it was confirmed that they do not do service at that location...I do not like to waste 5 mins much less 45!
In between all that I subjected myself to a bikini wax....no, I don't wear a bikini!
I got home and baked brownies. While they were on the back of the stove cooling one of the boxers, not sure whether it was Dumb or Dumber, managed to drag the pan forward and slurp a sizable chunk out of the middle.....precious puppies...
Weather forecast for tomorrow is thunder showers...do I commute into DC or work from home? Pros and Cons to both....
I cannot believe that school starts up in 3 weeks....the good news is that I ordered all of the school supplies from Amazon.com, got free shipping, and the prices are comparable to what's in Target....
What happened to going back to school with a new school bag, pencil case, two sharpened #2 pencils, a red pencil and a pink pearl eraser? I spent nearly $100 on school supplies and I'm not quite done. There's another $25-$30 on the list of things needed. Granted, I did not go to public school. My mom paid tuition but I have to believe that I'm shelling out more per year per child now for public school than she paid in tuition for the whole year?
I wonder how many pairs of Fiskars blunt tip kid scissors I will end up buying before I'm done? I think I've already bought a minimum of a half dozen.
I guess I should be grateful neither is into clothes at the moment - track pants and t-shirts work for him and whatever I buy is is fine with her because she sheds that and puts on her track pants and t-shirt as soon as she gets home...she's leading a double life...girly girl by school hours and tom-boy at home. Don't tell her I told you!
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Mid-Summer Touchpoint.....
The kids are having a pretty good summer and playing with neighborhood friends, just like in the old days when no one had yet coined the term "play date".
I've been busy with work during this middle part of the summer but not teaching. It's the good kind of busy - interesting work, interesting client, great team, clear expectations, good communication, flexibility about where I work. Everything I love about working at Deloitte!
We took our Outer Banks, NC beach vacation a bit earlier this year mostly due to indecision about whether to take the house for 1 week or 2 causing a delay in reserving and so we had to take what was available. One week is never enough in Corolla. I was ready to come home because of things on my mind back home, mostly work, but I could have been convinced to stay. We had a lovely week with no rainy, non-beach days. I read four books, did a fair amount of knitting, rode a bike to the beach every day, and steaming broccoli one evening was the extent of my cooking.
While I love late August vacations I will admit that having a little more summer left after the vacation is a nice change. I can actually show off my "savage tan" at the pool if the mood strikes.
I have a day of boating on Lake Anna, a trip with Kate and another mom and daughter to NYC to the American Girl Place, the Donna Summer concert to look forward to before summer ends.
This narrative of "what I did this summer" is devoid of any of my musings and witty remarks so pretty boring fare. More to come!
I've been busy with work during this middle part of the summer but not teaching. It's the good kind of busy - interesting work, interesting client, great team, clear expectations, good communication, flexibility about where I work. Everything I love about working at Deloitte!
We took our Outer Banks, NC beach vacation a bit earlier this year mostly due to indecision about whether to take the house for 1 week or 2 causing a delay in reserving and so we had to take what was available. One week is never enough in Corolla. I was ready to come home because of things on my mind back home, mostly work, but I could have been convinced to stay. We had a lovely week with no rainy, non-beach days. I read four books, did a fair amount of knitting, rode a bike to the beach every day, and steaming broccoli one evening was the extent of my cooking.
While I love late August vacations I will admit that having a little more summer left after the vacation is a nice change. I can actually show off my "savage tan" at the pool if the mood strikes.
I have a day of boating on Lake Anna, a trip with Kate and another mom and daughter to NYC to the American Girl Place, the Donna Summer concert to look forward to before summer ends.
This narrative of "what I did this summer" is devoid of any of my musings and witty remarks so pretty boring fare. More to come!
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Where On Earth Have I Been?
I've been working, I've been teaching, I've been taking care of home and hearth....I've been moping and wasting time in between like I always do!
Admitting the problem is the first step toward recovery though, right?
Sad, headache-y, feeling like I want to run away somewhere or at least hide here locally. I'm getting my wish. Going away on business travel for most of the next three weeks. Coming home on weekends. Can't even believe that starts on Monday.
Why can't I get motivated with this dream life of mine?
Earth to Cynde - snap out of it!
Admitting the problem is the first step toward recovery though, right?
Sad, headache-y, feeling like I want to run away somewhere or at least hide here locally. I'm getting my wish. Going away on business travel for most of the next three weeks. Coming home on weekends. Can't even believe that starts on Monday.
Why can't I get motivated with this dream life of mine?
Earth to Cynde - snap out of it!
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